A Letter To My Mom with Alzheimer’s

My Mom remembers me, but 30 minutes after I visit her, she does not remember that I was there. Mom can receive a phone call, but she can’t make one. She remembers to ask the same questions, every time we talk. How does Bruce like the new house? and How’s the store doing? And she always thanks me for thinking of her and for calling her. But if she does not write it down, she immediately forgets any of the answers to these questions. I’d like to write a letter to my Mom, to tell her some things that are on my heart, but I can’t because my Mom has Alzheimer’s.

A Letter To My Mom with Alzheimer’s Would Include Thank You’s

My fashion sense, my love of decorating, and my deep appreciation for all things antique come from my Mom. And I know more useless and useful information about table setting, china patterns and art than most people I know, thanks to my Mom. I’m sure I’ve thanked her countless times over the years for all these traits, but right now I’d like to thank her one more time. And have her remember how much I mean it.

A Letter To My Mom with Alzheimer’s Would Include Some Laughs

My brother got a marble stuck up his nose. Mom loaded us all in the car and we all giggled all the way to and from the ER. Mom had her own words for things that always made us laugh, like “bicka-bicka-bicka” for complaining too much about something and “ga-zun-ta” for someone who was a pain in the ass. The funniest part of this is that Mom said them to people outside of the family and would be rather shocked at times when they didn’t understand her. And Mom famously told my daughters that our oven was on fire, one Christmas Eve, in the tone you’d would use to ask someone to pass the salt. She made us laugh. I’d want her know that I appreciate it.

A Letter To My Mom with Alzheimer’s Includes Pride in My Citizenship

My Mom and my Grandmother were always involved in politics, both locally and nationally. And my Mom and Dad raised us kids to be involved as well. Working at the polls on election day was always a family affair. I would stand my requsite feet from the entrance, passing out last minute literature whilst Mom was inside checking in the voters. In the months before election day, Mom drove us around as we brought campaign literature door-to-door for whatever candidate’s campaign they were helping out. By involving us in the process from such a young age, Mom taught us all valuable lessons about how lucky we are to live in this country and the importance of taking part.

And Finally, My Letter Would Include Lots of Love

My Mom loved the heck out of my father. She still does. And my Dad loved her back with the ferocity of a religious zealot. He would tell anyone who would listen that she was “his favorite person.” She got to walk through life being loved like that and loving like that. It was a great example to me, as her child, to see that this is possible, this crazy, wonderful love of another. When I met Bruce I told her that I finally understood. I’d tell her that again… and again… and again.

Thanks, Mom. And thanks for reading my letter, my friends. Marianne

If you’d like to read some more of my blogs, you can check out: Lessons I Learned From My Dog and Subtle Ageism and What To Do About It. And in case you think someone you love may be struggling with memory issues or Alzheimer’s, here’s a great article from The Alzheimer’s Association: 10 Steps To Approach Memory Concerns in Others.

Thanks for reading my letter, my friends. And thanks, Mom. Marianne